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AMY SMITH LINTON

Variations on The Washington Post Style Invitational

7/28/2013

4 Comments

 
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The Washington Post puts on the Style Invitational -- a weekly contest involving words. It's a word-nerd favorite. The classic example: change a single letter in an existing word to create a useful new word, such as "reintarnation." 
Reintarnation = when you die and come back as a hillbilly.   

I'm a little stung that some of my better entries haven't won.  For instance, in "Children's Books that Will Never Get Published Contest" I'm still sold on Bi-Curious George. My Pop/Poet mash-up of T.S. "Misdemeanor" Eliot ("Ash Wednesday" + "Move It") should have earned me at least a Style Invitational  Loser coffee-cup, but no. My genius continues unrecognized.


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I woke in a Style Invitational mood, pondering the words latitude and altitude. High altitude. Changes in latitude. They sort of mean the same thing, these twin words -- a measure of some degree of distance from a set point -- even though one derives from alto (height) and the other latus (width). 

And there's attitude, originally referring to posture but which came from "aptitude" and the Latin "aptus" meaning "joined, fitted." 

Not needing much encouragement to chase a dovetail, I am led to other twin words that might be coined. 
If the twin word is a partial anagram, well, Attitude's brother is obvious -- someone has employed it, surely, to describe the quality of being both inked and snotty: Tatitude.

But how about Craftitude and Fractitude, which share only a 21st Century millieu?

Craftitude = your skill level in applying a glue gun and/or glitter to improve a situation. 
Fractitude = a measure of your ideological commitment to fossil fuels.
While Halitude and Ahlitude have an obvious onomatopeoic connection:
Halitude = a measure of how often you stop to check your breath, also, possibly, measure of the dragonesque quality of breath.
Ahltitude = level of the sound made when checking quality of breath.
With useful applications in my own daily life, Faltitude and Alfatude:
Faltitude = describes how much you can be blamed at any given moment.
Alfatude = your tendency to drive con brio; alternately, whether you handle the pack more or less like Cesar Millan. 
Full of judgement about other people's ideologies? Try Galtitude and Gallitude:
Galtitude = rates your similarity to John Galt and also, how much time you spent trudging through Ayn Rand as a teen.
Gallitude = your tendency to shrug and show disdain; also, the ability to irritate others by use of poor (ie "foreign") manners. 
Once this sort of thing starts, it's hard to stop: Waltitude and Awltitude:
Waltitude = your affinity for Disney gear.
Awltitude = your ability to pierce your way to the heart of the matter.
I slay myself.
Maltitude = rates your age based on the likelihood of your having slurped up an egg cream or malted blended by a genuine soda jerk.

Platitude = which is an insipid statement. Oddly a propos. Dammit.
Okay, fine. That may very well be a message from the subconscious that it's time to put away the toys and think about something marginally more useful. 
Wait. 
One more.
Aglatude = offers a quantitative ranking of all your moods. The ideal score is 42. (Thank you Douglas Adams.)
4 Comments
George Albaugh link
7/29/2013 07:06:11 am

In order to win the Style Invitational you need to change your name to "Chuck Smith" and tell them you live in Woodbridge, VA! Elisabeth also follows SI.

Reply
Amy
7/29/2013 11:40:44 am

Thanks for stopping by -- Hi to Elisabeth!
signed,
Chuck Smith

Reply
Greg
7/31/2013 03:39:48 pm

that gave me a Edatude, Learning despite what others think. Have a great day Chuck.

Reply
Amy
8/1/2013 01:43:38 am

My gratitude.
(snort-giggle)

Reply



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